I love men and I LOVE Being a Man but as I write this, it seems that men everywhere are under fire.

Men are under fire from women, from the media and as best as I can tell–men are on the fast track to becoming the laughing stock of the sexes.

The worst part of this from my perspective both as a man and as a relationship coach who works with men is that most men are oblivious to what’s going on.

The question is…Is it that we men are too blind to see what’s going on? We don’t care? Or is it that women really are superior?

Just to be clear, I don’t think that women are superior to men any more than men are superior to women. As genders, men and women are different to be sure and there are many ways in which we’re the same or similar.

Men AND women each have our strengths and weaknesses and as individuals, it’s the same way. Every man and every woman has individual strengths
and weaknesses as well. This isn’t right or wrong-good or bad–it just is.

Here’s where the problem comes in–and I want to share a fairly common example in the media today of what I’m talking about.

This example is from a McDonalds commercial that paints men with a pretty broad brush as total, incompetent fools and I’m not just picking on McDonalds here. McDonalds is just the example I’m using. There are plenty of other similar examples in the media that portray the same thing.

The McDonalds commercial I’m talking about opens with scene of a woman and man in their late 20’s or early 30’s in the airport ready to depart for their honeymoon.

The next thing that happens is that “He” gets a last second text message from his friends who happen to be at McDonalds enjoying a sandwich that’s back on the menu for a limited time only. The guy begins to pout about how upset he is that he’s possibly going to miss getting one (or more) of these sandwiches before they are gone.

His new wife cuts him off to remind him about their agreement about no texting or cell phones on the honeymoon and then because of how excited her new husband got about the new sandwich being brought back for a limited time..she cries out loud “I just married a 14 year old!”

This is just one example of many in the media these days that are portraying men as bumbling fools and idiots implying that men are the inferior sex. As I’ve said, this is a dynamic that is being portrayed over and over in the mainstream media and it’s dangerous for relationships and marriages on many levels.

In these portrayals, the women are over-the-top controlling, bossy, know-it-alls that are seen as (at least mentally) superior to men. What comes across in these kinds of portrayals is that she doesn’t trust him.

He gladly drops the ball.

He doesn’t have to take responsibility.

He takes the attitude that “Why even try?”

She thinks–”He’s probably not going to do the task that’s called for or he’ll do it wrong.

She gets resentful.

He withdraws and they’re both left wondering what went wrong with their relationship and where did the romance and the spark go?

Men end up living out of feelings of disconnectedness, disillusion and dis-empowerment.

So what’s the solution to all this?

From my perspective, when the man steps up and into his power, all these shenanigans and nonsense of making men look small goes away.

The problem is that on some level, men believe that they are inferior or these portrayals wouldn’t be as popular as they are.

We all wouldn’t laugh at them or think they are clever or funny.

He’s heard it so much, so often that he’s not good enough and that he’s not trustable that on some level–not only does he believe it, but it becomes a self–fulfilling prophecy.

Not good.

In order for this kind of nonsense to go away, we men have got to step up and be not only the kind of men that women want but stand in our center, our core, the deepest part of ourselves and discover how to be BOTH powerful (and responsible) AND vulnerable at the same time.

We men need to decide the direction and purpose of our lives and go for that purpose with 100 percent certainty and clarity.

I go into this in detail in my ebook and audio program “Light Her Up” that you can find here.

And I cover the right way and the wrong way to communicate with women in our “Crash Course In Communicating With Women.”

Oh, and one more thing…

If you want to tap into my latest insights and advice for men to help you light up your woman, be sure and sign up for my “Light Her Up” newsletter in the form below…

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If you’re a man, you may not know this but women everywhere wonder about THIS question much more than you might ever think…

Her question is this: “What *IF* he wants another woman more than me?”

Of course, if you’re doing the kinds of things I teach in my “Light Her Up” book and audio program, she won’t ever be wondering if you’re messing around on her, that you want someone else more than her or if she’ll be “replaced.”

If you learn how to “light her up,” you’ll be one of the small percentage of men who get everything they want from their woman because you know what she wants and how to give it to her.

Question from a reader–Jim writes…”How do I make myself secretly desire my wife instead of other women?”

My Comments :

HI Jim, Thanks very much for the question. This is a question and topic many men struggle with and I have some insights and suggestions that should help you deal with your question.

If you’re living with the question of “How do I make myself secretly desire my wife instead of other women?” then one of these things is likely going on…

1. You haven’t truly committed yourself to one woman

2. You don’t really want to be with YOUR woman

3. You focus on all your woman’s negative aspects and qualities instead of what you love, like, appreciate and the things that turn you on about her

Or…

4. It could be that you are just plain bored (or feel bad about yourself) and are looking at other women as a way to rev up your excitement, passion and desire in the intimacy, sex (or life) department.

I work with a lot of men (and couples) one-on-one, both in person and by telephone, every day to help them keep the spark alive in their relationship or marriage and no matter whether it’s one of these reasons or something else that’s going on, one of the first things I would ask you if I were your coach would be…

Are you committed to being with just YOUR woman?

One of my next questions would be…

Are you interested in having lots of passion, spark and connection with YOUR woman?

If your answer is *Yes* to those two questions then my advice to you would be very simple…

Appreciate the beauty, radiance and sexiness of all the women that you see or come in contact with AND do everything you can to make your woman feel like the most special and important woman on the face of the earth.

This is probably going to require you to spend more time focusing on what’s great about or what’s sexy about your woman instead of other women. It’s probably going to require you to spend more time giving your woman your full and complete attention and it’s probably going to require you to get to know what it would take to make your woman feel special–and then your job is to do THAT.

What I have found to be true is that you can’t light up YOUR woman if you’re spending too much time either in reality or your own thoughts focusing on “other” women.

Believe me, I’ve tried it in other relationships long before getting with my wife Susie and I don’t think it’s possible to spend your sexual, spiritual or emotional energy on other women and make YOUR woman feel #1 in your world.

She’ll notice.

Women are very intuitive and they will know at some level where your heart and mind is.

What I would do to increase my desire for my woman (if that’s what I wanted) is to spend some time with a note pad and pen asking myself questions like these and writing out my answers…

What do I find sexy about my wife or girlfriend?

What is it about her that turns me on?

What do I appreciate most about her?

My experience has been that no matter how much more drawn you are to other women, the more you focus on YOUR woman, the more you will find attractive about her.

As the saying goes…We always find what we’re looking for in life.

Same thing in your relationship with your woman– you get more of what you focus on. The question is… what will you choose to focus on?

Something that will bring the two of you closer together or something that will keep the two of you further apart? The choice is always yours.

Oh, and one more thing…

If you want to tap into my latest insights and advice for men to help you light up your woman, be sure and sign up for my “Light Her Up” newsletter in the form below…

Subscribe now and enjoy FREE:

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Today I’ve got a couple of great tips for you for how to deal with your relationship (and your woman) when relationship challenges pop up.

As a relationship coach and a mentor for men I can tell you that relationship challenges can take on a million different looks but one thing that’s for sure is…

If you aren’t “feeling it” from your woman and you’re not getting what you want from her, then it can be incredibly frustrating to say the least.

If there’s yelling, fighting or anything else that’s keeping you from having the best possible relationship with your woman, I highly suggest you pick up a copy of my “Light Her Up” program as soon as possible.

Here’s why…

This is the first book and program of its kind that is specifically FOR MEN interested in how to make a committed relationship or marriage work at a
whole new level–one that’s filled with love, passion, intimacy and lots of sex.

Most of the feedback I’ve gotten about the book suggests that what I cover in the material isn’t necessarily “rocket science” or all that difficult, but the ideas and info in the book is what ALL women want from their men (if they would only give it to them).

Light Her Up shows men, like you, not only what to do to make your woman happy but with what you’re going to learn how to do–she’s going to feel so loved by you and so connected to you, she will gladly want to have sex with you 2, 3, 5 or 10 times as much as she does now.

~~~ Question from a frustrated reader:

“Hi Otto –

“I wanted to drop you a quick note and see if you had any suggestions for me.

“The most frustrating thing for myself and my relationship is the yelling and fighting.

“The things I most want is more respect on both half’s…a better understanding of each other, and just a happy and loving, caring relationship with my wife.

“There is no one else I would rather spend my life with but I’m really frustrated right now…What can I do?

Rick (a Loyal reader)”

~~~~~ My Comments :

Hi Rick–

Being frustrated is no way to go through life.

Believe me, before I figured all this stuff out and started doing things differently, I’ve been there where you are in my previous marriage and relationships so I know it’s no fun.

One thing I gotta’ tell you that should make you feel better is to let you know that sometimes even the smallest of shifts in the way you’re thinking and what you’re doing can make all the difference.

Take for example your statement about how frustrated because of the yelling and fighting.

Yelling and fighting (and most other relationship challenges, as well) almost always happen because one or both people are stuck trying to prove to each other how right they are and how much the other partner should just admit it.

In fact, most people (guys especially) really live from the place that “everything would be OK if she were only more like me!”

My suggestion is to “get curious” more of the time instead of getting frustrated and learn to appreciate your differences instead of making those differences wrong.

The thing about the respect that you want is that respect is something you can’t manufacture or create just because you want respect.

In fact, respect is a natural outcome of you standing in your center, deciding who YOU are, what you want for your life and going for it full out while living and loving with an open loving heart.

Think about it…

Anyone that you respect in your life is someone who makes a commitment about how he’s going to be in his life, what he’s going to do and then he goes and does it without excuses.

As for communication challenges…

You can download all my best strategies for communicating with your woman here in my “Crash Course In Communicating With Women” program.

Believe me when I say that life’s too short to go through it pissed off and frustrated all the time.

You deserve love and a woman that’s happy to be with you.

I’m here to help you with ideas to help you along the way.

Oh, and one more thing…

If you want to tap into my latest insights and advice for men to help you light up your woman, be sure and sign up for my “Light Her Up” newsletter in the form below…

Subscribe now and enjoy FREE:

• Unlimited access to latest articles & content
• Exclusive emailed discounts & bonuses
• FREE Relationship Tips newsletter with in-depth advice
• Report: 10 Biggest Relationship and Passion killing
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Here’s The Craziest Thing I’ve Ever Heard About Relationships…

The trouble is–I hear it from men (and women too) ALL the time and it’s one of the things that keeps you from having the love you really want….

It’s something a guy said to me the other day and it certainly isn’t the first time someone has said something like this to me.

A man I know (let’s call him “Mike”) and I were having lunch a few days ago and I invited him to a free talk that my wife Susie and I were doing later that week on relationships.

What he said was mind boggling.

Of course both men and women have said things like this to me so much in the past that I shouldn’t be surprised by it anymore but it still takes me aback when it happens.

After being invited to come to our talk on relationships, “Mike” said to me…

“But I’m not in a relationship.”

When he said that…

It took all I could do to keep from smacking him real good and calling him a stupid idiot or worse!

He wasn’t interested in our talk because he’s not currently in a relationship with a woman–although he had just finished telling me how he wants to be in one and can’t seem to figure out why he’s not.

Duh…

Whether you’re in a relationship or you’re not and you’d like to be–here’s some friendly advice…

If you’re in a relationship and you know that you need help, by all means –get it!

If you’re in a relationship and NOT in a relationship crisis, then don’t wait until you desperately NEED relationship advice before you start looking for it.

Learn some new ideas and skills to make your love even better and keep growing.

And…

It sounds kind of crazy but if you’re NOT in a relationship and you want to be- This is also one of the best times to get some good advice (and not from your best friend, your uncle or the guy at the club)-unless they’re trained professionals about love and relationships.

If you’re still single or you’re in a relationship and it isn’t going so well…there’s probably a reason why.

It might be helpful for you to try to figure out why love is passing you by BEFORE you’re on your death bed.

Perhaps even now…

To learn some great Communication Skills, I suggest that you check out my, “Crash Course In Communicating With Women”

Oh, and one more thing…

If you want to tap into my latest insights and advice for men to help you light up your woman, be sure and sign up for my “Light Her Up” newsletter in the form below…

Subscribe now and enjoy FREE:

• Unlimited access to latest articles & content
• Exclusive emailed discounts & bonuses
• FREE Relationship Tips newsletter with in-depth advice
• Report: 10 Biggest Relationship and Passion killing
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If you’ve been alive for very long at all, you know that “storms” are a part of life.

Storms come and they go but some people are actually addicted to the drama of “storms” and actually “chase” them, especially relationship storms.

Chasing storms like tornadoes and hurricanes isn’t the smartest thing in the world to do but plenty of otherwise intelligent people do it anyway.

It’s the same way in our relationships–some men actually get off on creating drama and “storms” in their
relationships that almost NEVER take them closer toward what they want with their woman.

So how do you tell if you’re a Relationship “Storm Chaser” and what do you do next if you are?

I watched my 22 year old son with fascination as he watched the TV show “Storm Chasers” and I gotta’ admit it’s quite the show.

If you’ve never caught an episode or you’ve never heard of it…

Storm Chasers is a TV show on the Discovery Channel that highlights a group of scientists and filmmakers who
hunt down tornadoes to capture stunning severe weather video and valuable scientific data that will eventually help teach scientists and meteorologists how to predict storms more accurately.

“Storm Chasers” is great because it’s a pure adrenaline rush for the storm chasers and as someone who’s
watching–you don’t have to go get in the middle of a tornado and actually get in harms way to get the effect of what’s going on and how exciting and dangerous it is.

This reminds me a little bit of the way some men are in their relationships and marriages.

They aren’t happy until and unless they’re stirring up a bunch of S%&*# on a regular basis with their woman.

It’s crazy, I know. but…

It’s actually true that some men aren’t happy until and unless they’re creating some kind of drama or chasing a “relationship storm” (usually brought on by some communication challenge with their woman….)

In relationships where there are a lot of “storms,” one of the things I occasionally wonder about is something like…

“How would it be possible to have the relationship, love and passion and yes, sex and intimacy you want–without all the drama?”

The bottom line is that I think everyone would be better off and both men and women would both get what they want more of if there were less drama and “Storms” to deal with in their relationships and life.

A “storm” can be a lot of things but here are a couple of things specifically that “storms” in a relationship revolve around…

– Drama

– Upsets and

– All the things we do that keep the drama and upsets going long after the situation has calmed itself down.

You know you’re in a relationship “storm” when you’re upset and you can’t even remember why.

It’s a “storm” if it’s a conflict that one or both people seem attached to or committed to holding onto.

It’s a “storm” when anything has happened that causes the two of you to feel separated and disconnected from each other.

I’ve got a couple of quick suggestions (and a couple of resources) for you to consider the next time you find
yourself in a “relationship storm” that you wish would blow over much faster than it seems to be moving.

1) Take a look at your “why” for why you keep conflicts going instead of finding ways to resolve them.

This might be to prove a point, to make sure she knows you’re “right” and she’s wrong or any number of other reasons.

If you’re doing anything to keep the drama and conflict going– stop it.

2) Don’t stand and fight but don’t run away either.

Neither “fighting” with her or running away when things get tough will light your woman up and make her more open to you.

3) Communicate, Communicate, Communicate.

If you don’t know how to do this in a way that opens your woman’s heart, mind, soul and body to you, you are really missing out on the power of communicating to connect with her.

You can download the recordings from an online seminar my wife Susie and I did a few months back called “a Crash Course In Communicating With Women”

The great thing about communicating with your woman at the heart and soul level that we teach is that feeling “connected to you” is one of her greatest desires.

Make her feel truly and deeply “connected” to you and you can take your relationship from Stormy to sensational in no time at all.

If you’ve got any comments about this article, drop me a note and let me know what you’re thinking.

Oh, and one more thing…

If you want to tap into my latest insights and advice for men to help you light up your woman, be sure and sign up for my “Light Her Up” newsletter in the form below…

Subscribe now and enjoy FREE:

• Unlimited access to latest articles & content
• Exclusive emailed discounts & bonuses
• FREE Relationship Tips newsletter with in-depth advice
• Report: 10 Biggest Relationship and Passion killing
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In just a moment I’m going to tell about something you’re already doing with women…and how to do it better.

My idea is–if you’re going to do something… why not do everything you can to get the result you want?

One of these aspects of relationship and relating to women (or your woman) is your communication.

Most women my wife Susie and I talk to in our relationship coaching practice tell us they want their men to communicate better with them.

The thing we’ve observed from men like you (in most cases ) is that you don’t have any idea what she’s talking about when she says she wants better communication from you.

Fortunately for you, I’ve created what I call a “Crash Course in Communicating With Women…”

This totally takes the guesswork out of how to communicate with women (especially your wife or intimate partner) and shows you how to give her what she wants as well as how to communicate with her in ways
that helps you get more of what you want too.

Here’s a mind-boggling thought that’s true for both men and women…

Whether you realize it or not…

and…

Whether we’re consciously aware of it or not…

We are ALWAYS teaching our partner, our beloved, or the woman we just met at work or at a restaurant how to be with us.

That’s right.

With every look, every frown, every gesture every smile, every word and every moment, we’re training the woman in our lives (or the woman we want to be in our life) how to be with us.

The problem is…

For most of us guys we are “training” the women in our lives to be with us in ways we DON’T want instead of the ways we do want.

One of the best ways to “train” a woman to give you more of what you want (and make her happy in the process) is to give her more of what she wants.

I call this “lighting her up.”

One way you can do this is by giving her appreciation for doing specific things.

For example:

Whenever she wears something you find especially alluring, tell her how much you like it and specifically how and how much it turns you on.

You might say something like…

“I really like the way your new top shows off the curve of your____________. I find that to be really sexy.”

The key is in the specificity and the other key is in the way that you appreciate her.

You’ll shoot yourself in the foot if you expect her to go to bed with you right then and there–so don’t appreciate her with that expectation.

Even though you might have an agenda for doing it… don’t just appreciate her to “get” something.

If you do that, she’s going to see right through it and not only will it piss her off but make her suspicious of what you say in the future about whether what you say is true or not..

In other words, your agenda should be to just appreciate her so she “lights up” as I
like to say.

You’ll find many more great tips for lighting up your woman in my book and audio
program called “Light Her Up.”

Oh, and one more thing…

If you want to tap into my latest insights and advice for men to help you light up your woman, be sure and sign up for my “Light Her Up” newsletter in the form below…

Subscribe now and enjoy FREE:

• Unlimited access to latest articles & content
• Exclusive emailed discounts & bonuses
• FREE Relationship Tips newsletter with in-depth advice
• Report: 10 Biggest Relationship and Passion killing
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I hear from a lot of men who basically “bend over backwards”‘ to try to please their woman and make her happy.

This isn’t good or bad except when she can’t “feel you” and doesn’t feel your love and doesn’t feel that deep, warm, loving connection between the two of you.

Most men don’t understand their women, why they act the way they do and especially don’t understand why their women act the way they do with and around them.

We wonder “what’s up with her?”

We also think…

She used to be nice and loving. Why is she acting so weird?

What happened?

Here’s a quick example of what I’m talking about…

Men think:

“I wish she’d stop nagging, bitching and complaining.”

She thinks:

“I wish I could get him to step up and really be the man I know he can be.”

She thinks:

“I’ll just give him some hints (strong ones) to let him know how he could ‘light me up’ and make me want to really be with him in the way he wants.”

He thinks:

“I’ve had it. … I’ll just withdraw, distract myself or check out physically or emotionally.”

Here’s the point:

All the downright “weird” behavior that we men get from our women is usually either their attempt to get us to connect with them or get us to “step up” and be the man they see and know we can be.

The problem is… we men don’t usually see this.

Arguments happen.

We fight.

We defend.

We protect.

We don’t step up.

We don’t love, connect and communicate.

The results are usually tragic (especially when they don’t have to be.)

My wife Susie and I believe that passion, love and connection never have to die.

To keep it alive…

We just have to learn how we can continue to stay open and loving to our partner no matter what is going on and understand how to communicate and connect with her in ways that continually open her instead of shut her down and close her up.

This isn’t always easy but the rewards are certainly worth it.

Oh, and one more thing…

If you want to tap into my latest insights and advice for men to help you light up your woman, be sure and sign up for my “Light Her Up” newsletter in the form below…

Subscribe now and enjoy FREE:

• Unlimited access to latest articles & content
• Exclusive emailed discounts & bonuses
• FREE Relationship Tips newsletter with in-depth advice
• Report: 10 Biggest Relationship and Passion killing
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A couple of days ago, it was my son’s birthday and the night before his b-day I took him out to eat. At the restaurant, we chose to sit at a table for two in the bar area so we could talk and catch part of a baseball game we wanted to see that was on TV.

There was a man and woman, in their mid-thirties, who were sitting at the bar just to our left having dinner.
They were obviously “in love” and weren’t afraid to show it. They also seemed to be able to easily communicate with one another.

Because I’m a relationship coach, I just smiled because I was reminded of a couple of things about relationships…

First…

Communicating With Your Woman Is NOT Rocket Science.

Communicating with your woman, however, (if done in a way that opens her) does require you to communicate a little differently than most men are willing to do.

That’s why I created a “Crash Course In Communicating With Women” — to show you how easy it is to use simple communication to Light Up Your Woman.

So back to the couple at the restaurant…

No, we didn’t see them doing anything lewd or showing any over-the-top displays of public affection.

What we did see from this man was something every man could learn a great deal from.

We saw this man and his woman totally “into” each other.

They were having dinner there at the bar AND…

~~ Their bodies were turned about a fourth of the way toward each other so they could face each other.

~~They were laughing, talking and having a good time

~~ They were subtly flirting with each other (it was fun to watch)

~~ They obviously were enjoying each others company

~~ They certainly didn’t seem bored

~~ They were passionate

~~ They were playful

~~ They were connecting

And what’s really cool about what this man did with his woman is that everything he did wasn’t “rocket science.”

Every man alive could do what this man did to “light up his woman” and make her happy (if he wanted to).

And that’s not all…

What this man was doing with his woman was the very thing that EVERY woman really wants from her man.

He was giving her his total and undivided attention.

It appeared to me (as an observer from 4 feet away) that he was doing everything he could to make her feel special and at the same time still feel like a man too.

She was eating this up and you could tell this by the look on her face, her body language. and how she was interacting with this guy.

I believe that any man can indeed learn how to “light up” his woman and keep the love, passion and s#x alive for as long as he wants if he will only shift a few things he’s doing with her.

I believe you can create a relationship or marriage that’s so far beyond what you think is possible now for your life that it would blow your mind if you only really know the truth.

It’s also my belief that passion NEVER has to die in a relationship and passion, love and connection is a matter
of choice not chance.

Oh, and one more thing…

If you want to tap into my latest insights and advice for men to help you light up your woman, be sure and sign up for my “Light Her Up” newsletter in the form below…

Subscribe now and enjoy FREE:

• Unlimited access to latest articles & content
• Exclusive emailed discounts & bonuses
• FREE Relationship Tips newsletter with in-depth advice
• Report: 10 Biggest Relationship and Passion killing
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What is it that most men who don’t get what they want from their women don’t get?

It’s very simple really and it only requires you to do a little “backwards thinking.”

Not backwards as in you’re going backwards but backwards thinking as in looking at the past and looking at the now, openly and honestly.

In other words, noticing what women want, desire and expect from their man today that in years gone by men didn’t have to give.

Let me explain:

This may be an oversimplification and I certainly know there’s much more to men and women relationship dynamics than this but here’s one major thing that’s hard to miss the importance of…

Years ago the roles of men and women were much more clearly and narrowly defined than they are now and here’s why this is important.

Used to be a man could “light up his woman,” make her happy and get what he wanted too just by simply “being a man.”

Used to be, all he had to do was love her, go to work, bring home a paycheck, not screw around on her, be nice to her every now and then and he was home free.

Today, all of those things are still true but there’s one other thing that women truly crave from their man that’s no longer on their “wish list.”

It’s now on the list of things that are required from a man if he has any hope of “lighting her up” and making her happy and excited about being with him.

So what is this mystical, strange ability that your woman craves?

It’s the ability for a man to still be a man AND be someone who is also emotionally available to her.

Gone are the days when a man could avoid getting in touch with his emotions, avoid talking about things we’d consider to be “emotional” and continuing to live in the mental realm that most men live in almost
exclusively–(although we still try).

Something I spend a whole chapter on in my “Light Her Up” book and audio program is the idea that you have to learn the art of being BOTH powerful and vulnerable
at the same time.

That’s right.

Years ago, we men thought that all we had to do to win a woman’s heart was to be a totally masculine, solid, focused, centered man who was willing to “fight” for her–and at one time that was enough.

Today we have to be emotionally available to her and emotionally with her too.

The idea’s not to try to be like your woman in the emotions department–(we couldn’t if we tried). The idea is to be a solid, focused man who also is able to be aware of what he’s feeling and then act from a centered place inside him.

A quick example of this from my own life might be…

I used to get very angry and then deny that it was really happening to myself and others.

Once I realized that I wasn’t always the calm, loving and gentle guy that I imagined myself to be, I had to take the emotional trip into anger.

I couldn’t put it off any longer.

It was painful for me to go there but if I wanted to go deeper with my woman and be the best me I could possibly be, it was totally necessary.

Now I no longer blame my wife when the issue has nothing to do with her.

If I’m upset or angry, I take a look inside me to look for the reasons why instead to looking outside me.

This makes my relationship with my wife Susie so much stronger because I’m taking responsibility for my emotions and not blaming her for everything–and what’s more…

Unlike most other men, I’m also willing to talk about what’s going on inside me emotionally.

I’m willing to talk about my hopes, my fears, my upsets, my anger or anything else that comes up for me.

My woman loves this.

Most other women do too.

This is especially important when you take into consideration how many women tell us just how much they want their man to “open up” to them and we won’t.

And I’m not talking about whining around either.

Men think communicating with a woman is just plain hard and it doesn’t have to be.

This is why I created my “Crash Course In Communicating With Women…”

To show men how to communicate in ways that effortlessly and almost automatically draw your woman closer to you just by how you communicate with her.

Today I want to talk to you about three simple and somewhat “sneaky” ways for finding out what your woman likes, how she thinks and what makes her happy…

If you want to know what makes a woman tick…What makes her happy to be alive…What is important to a woman….What turns a woman on sexually….

Here are three of my favorite ways of unlocking the mystery of my woman and finding out what makes her happy.

As I’ve said many times before…

You can get everything you want from being in a relationship with your woman (and more) if you will only figure out what lights her up and makes her happy.

Doing THIS isn’t “rocket science” but it does require thinking a little differently and being open to her in some new ways you may not have considered before.

So, here are three very practical and doable ways that any man can find out what makes his woman tick and what’s important to her…

One of the first things I’ll recommend is that you occasionally read an issue of Cosmo, Redbook, or Oprah magazine. I don’t just mean look at the cover and scan the table of contents for the issue you’re holding.

I mean, really read it.

It doesn’t matter whether you like the magazine (or agree with what they say) or not. What is important is that you start to tap into the consciousness of women and what’s important to them.

It may seem obvious but the content in Oprah’s magazine “O” is much different than the content of ESPN the magazine, Maxim, Esquire or Men’s Health.

Looking through and reading these kinds of magazines can really help you to get a deeper sense of what’s important in the lives of women and in some ways, your woman.

Next…

If you want to know how to communicate with women…

I’ve created a “Crash Course in Communicating With Women” that’s gotten rave reviews. If you’re a man who wants more from his relationship or marriage, go download this program now.

If you want to know how to make your woman happy and how to please your woman in bed, one thing you can do is read an erotic novel or maybe even a romance novel that’s written for women.

No, I’m not talking about the hard-core-pound-your-woman-into-submission material that you might typically hide from your woman if she knew you were checking it out.

Again, I’m talking about erotic novels that are typically written for women.

These are the kind of books where sexual experiences are described with such exquisite detail that ALL of the senses are involved. They are the kind of stories that describe situations where women are treated
like goddesses and pleasured beyond their wildest dreams.

I’m reading one of these erotic novels right now called “Exotica” and it’s a good reminder for me about how I should be with my woman if I want to please her in the bedroom.

One final way of finding out what will make your wife, or girlfriend happy is by simply asking her what she would like or what she would prefer in certain situations.

This doesn’t mean she always has to get her way but you won’t believe how things can change for the better if you are involving her in discussions, decisions and getting her input about matters small and large.

A brief word of caution for us guys…

I’ve talked to quite a few men recently who think that if you tune into emotional kinds of things with your woman that you’ll lose your masculinity.

How crazy is that?

I have found that you can be BOTH a huge masculine presence AND totally in tune and in touch with your emotions as well as your woman’s emotions.

One man recently even went as far as to say that if he tuned into his and his woman’s emotional issues that he thought he would turn into a big “Pu***y.”

I told him he couldn’t be more wrong.

I told him it takes a mighty big man (or woman) to look at and face emotional issues and challenges.

Discovering how to turn your woman on, how to make her happy and how to please your woman in and out of bed can be so much fun but you have to make it fun and not like a chore, a job or some painful act.

Oh, and one more thing…

If you want to tap into my latest insights and advice for men to help you light up your woman, be sure and sign up for my “Light Her Up” newsletter in the form below…

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